So I was just sitting here at my desk thinking about this journey that I’m on. you always hear that saying- something like, it’s not about the destination it’s about the journey— or something like that? I’m so bad with sayings, it’s really kind of ridiculous. Anyway, I’ve been stressing this week because I haven’t lost any weight since last Wednesday. I mean, I know how insane that is- I hope you do too! BUT, I’ve decided to let go. I’m not going to stress about how much I’ve lost or how quickly it’s happening. I WILL HAPPEN. I’m not going to feel sorry for myself, even though I am feeling a little justified in my pre-op freak out about being the (mythical) 3%. I’ve said for a long time that my body hates me- this is not a lie. However, I also hate my body, so I guess I can’t ask for much in return.

I wish that I could say something profound like, “I’ve decided to love my body!” and have it be some life-changing event, but that’s not going to happen– at least for a while. If I said it, it would be a lie. So forget that…for now. For now, I will be patient: I will go about my daily business, avoid the scale except at doctor’s appointments (or at least I’ll try) I’ll eat right and exercise daily- I will give my body NO excuses for hating me. I will simply take care of simply because it is the right thing to do. I’m not going to compare my “success” to other’s, I’m just going to enjoy whatever progress I make and even though I was really hoping that I would be one of those “drastic weightloss patients”, I’ll be happy being a successful weightloss patient- even if it takes three years to get there. –yeah, that would TOTALLY suck ass! And, I WOULD NOT be happy if it took three years, in fact, I’d be down right pissed, but eh. We’ll see.

Oh, btw, I got my period yesterday. That’s three times in three months- this is a first. I wonder if this is a new thing that will stick? Weird. I guess now that I’ve decided that I don’t want kids my ovaries have decided to start working. See it’s not my imagination. My body hates me! True story.

The End.

Down 30lbs from my highest (2.5 weeks pre-op, when I started the liquid diet- this is the number I like best, for obvious reasons)

Down 10lbs since day of surgery (26 days post op) GRRRRRRRR!