MAY 16, 2014
Even though I have lost 164lbs and I am at my doctor’s goal weight…
Even though I have been doing crossfit 4-5 days a week for almost 2 years and eat a very clean diet (90% of the time)…
Even though I am a certified personal trainer and a Spartan, a Rugged Maniac, a Warrior and a Triathlete…
This is what my body looks like (almost) naked.
Because of this I try very hard to stay focused on fitness goals as my measure of success rather than my appearance, or the number on the scale, or the size of my jeans, but sometimes, just sometimes, I forget…
I am extremely passionate about sharing my story and the lessons I’ve learned in hopes of inspiring others to live their own I’mperfect Life!

MAY 16, 2014
A few weeks ago I did just that…I forgot. I was faced with a “Look Good Naked Challenge” at my gym that I knew I had no chance in hell of winning. I remembered that summer was just around the corner and realized that I would go a 25th year wearing shorts over my bathing suit to hide the legs I’ve hated since I was 11. I tried on a jean skirt that I wanted so bad only to see my misshapen knees that have kept me from wearing anything above them throughout all of my adult years, and out of nowhere it hit me like a ton of bricks…I felt frustrated, discouraged and sad. Like really, really sad. I even cried a little. I felt like all the hard work that I’d been doing wasn’t paying off and it made me want to give up.
I spent a good week or so feeling sorry for myself, getting caught up in the vanity of it all. I didn’t work as hard at the gym, I didn’t eat as well as I usually do and every time I looked in the mirror I felt worse than I had the time before.
I can’t recall if there was something specific that got me to pull my head out of my ass, but fortunately something did. (could have just been the end of my period…fricken hormones!) Regardless of what it was, I decided that it was time to REALLY celebrate what my ugly body CAN DO rather than focus on what it looks like…or doesn’t look like. So I asked my friend Emily, the amazing photographer, to take some pictures of me DOING the THINGS I have NEVER, EVER…EVER in my entire life…not even as a kid (with the exception of the cartwheel) have been able to do until now.
So here you go! Today I am celebrating what my body is capable of doing because of the lifestyle changes that I’ve made and the hard work I’ve done in and out of the gym.
I am PROUD of my ugly body because...
THIS BACK AND THOSE ARMS
ARE STRONG ENOUGH TO DO THIS (no strings attached!)
THIS BACKSIDE
CAN DO A CARTWHEEL A GRACEFUL AS ANY (NOVICE) GYMNAST
THESE SADDLEBAGS, STRETCH MARKS AND CELLULITE
CAN’T STOP ME FROM BEING SUPER FLEXIBLE
THAT LOOSE UNDERARM SKIN
DOESN’T MEAN I CAN’T CLIMB THIS THING
THE REMAINING FAT ALL OVER MY BODY
DOESN’T MEAN I’M NOT STRONG ENOUGH TO FLIP A FLIPPIN TIRE
MY FLABBY TUMMY
HAS THE CORE STRENGTH THAT ALLOWS ME TO ACT LIKE KID
THESE PUDGY LEGS
PROVIDE ME WITH ENOUGH STRENGTH AND STABILITY TO DO A ONE LEGGED SQUAT (with great amounts of concentration!)
AND THIS…ALL OF THIS
WOULDN’T KEEP ME FROM LOOKING STRONG AND SEXY…
IF I LIVED ON THE MOON
Besides, I still look cute in a pair of jeans…
AND I’M…
BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY
NO MATTER HOW UNCOMFORTABLE I AM DISPLAYING MY BODY DURING THE SUMMER MONTHS…
I NEVER, EVER WANT TO BE AS UNCOMFORTABLE AS I WAS IN THIS BODY 365 DAYS A YEAR
PS: This post was originally written in May of 2014 when I was 36 years old and before I had children. A lot has changed since then, especially my body, but my love, appreciation, and commitment to taking care of it hasn’t. It is still an amazing body that let’s me live an amazing life. <3
If you're struggling to live your ideal happy and healthy lifestyle, in a body that you love, please consider joining me and a group of incredible women who are working to do the same!
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Andrea, I found this blog through Facebook, and I am so glad I did. I am still pre-op, but my concern has always been what I would look like after the weight loss. How bad would by excess skin be? You know what? It doesn’t matter. I am choosing LIFE over DEATH, and excess skin is nothing in comparison to that. All I can do is my best. I have to do the very best eating, the very best exercising, the very best resting and pampering I can do for me. If I have done my best, that is all that matters. If I have to live life in Spanks and compression garments, it still outweighs the burden of living life carrying so much weight. You have inspired me today. You have taken that ridiculous worry away from me today. Thank you.
I love to hear that! Good luck with your weight loss! Life is much better on this side of things, no matter what the body looks like! 🙂
Thank you for sharing your story! I forgot how amazing we are. I always hated my body but I am now trying to be more comfortable with it. I am trying to get my cartwheel, handstand, and splits this year.
We ARE amazing! Show me a picture when you do! I wanna see! 😀 http://www.facebook.com/imperfect4life<3
I just wanted to say that you have truly inspired me. I’ve been struggling with weight loss and I knew that most likely I was going to have loose skin if I lost a large amount of weight that I want. Today I had two family members make a joke about my weight and it really hit home for me. These were people that I thought would never be cruel to me in that way but what they thought was funny was extremely hurtful. Thank you for sharing your story. You have inspired me to get back in the game and do something for myself. (: I seriously can’t thank you enough! You rock 100%!! (:
Big hugs, Kaity! Love yourself just the way you are and use that love to do the things you want to do! <3