So the last blog I wrote was on Tuesday night. The evening of our first full day with two new boys. It is now Friday morning and we’ve had three full days of two boys and just added a third child to the mix last night…their sister.

We are officially the proud foster parent to three incredible children.

I really wanted to write a blog Wednesday night because so much happened since I wrote the one the night before- what a difference a day makes. All day I had been making mental notes of all the little things I wanted to remember. But by the time the kids were in bed, and Brett and I had a chance to unwind, I just couldn’t find the energy to do it.

I tried again last night, but again, I was too tired. So I’m up early this morning– I don’t want to forget any more details of this amazing experience.

Wednesday morning, I got up early. Took a shower, got dressed and made coffee. (a lesson I learned in a book that I read last year- shower first!) When the boys woke up, they came downstairs all by themselves. I didn’t have to go upstairs and give them permission, they knew it was okay to do it themselves. –progress! We had breakfast and then they played.

A couple hours later, while I was cleaning up the kitchen, the little one asked me, “what are you making?” I said, “nothing, I was just cleaning up, why? did you want something?”

Big grin, “mmmhmm”

“What would you like?”

“Peanut butter and jelly.”

“Okay, come in here and we’ll make it together.”

Big grin, “okay”

It was another huge step in the right direction.

***

This whole foster parenting thing is definitely a learning process. I’m finding that I hadn’t thought about things like: where are they going to put their dirty clothes? Hell, where are they going to put their clean clothes?! (mental note, we need to buy hangers and a dresser) What are our rules about where grape juice is consumed? Where do we now put three extra pairs of shoes- the living the room? Family room? Should I get a shoe cubby? Again, WHERE do we put the shoes? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

There are also other things I hadn’t thought about. Like the first time we went somewhere in the car…

On Wednesday, I took the boys to Monkey Joe’s. I told them about it in the morning. They didn’t know what it was, so I tried to explain, “it’s a big huge indoor playground where you can run and play and climb and slide! It’s going to be so much fun!” They looked at me like I was crazy- I kind of took for granted that they knew what a playground was, but I’m not sure that actually do (did).

Okay, so- I told them about it all morning. And when it was time to actually go, I said, “put your shoes and socks on it’s time to go!” in a very excited voice. They put their shoes and socks on, I gathered my things and we went to the garage. This was the first time we’d left the house since they had come to stay with us.

Not thinking twice, Brett and I buckled them in, I said to goodbye to Brett, got in the car and began to drive away. Instantly the mood changed. The boys had gone from rambunctious to somber. I asked them if they were excited to go to Monkey Joe’s and they softly said, “yeah” with zero excitement. It was more like they were just saying it because they “had” to, in order to be agreeable.

I tried to lighten the mood a little bit with chit chat, when it dawned on me. They last TWO times they were in a car they were being taken away from the home where they were staying. My heart sunk. I tried to explain to them that we were just going to play and when we were done we’d be going straight back home. I tried to convince them that everything was going to be okay, but I quickly realized, their trust was something I was going to have to earn.

When we walked in to Monkey Joe’s the boys were a little overwhelmed. They have been homeschooled all their lives and from what I know, they have never socialized with other children. So this was probably terrifying. I reminded myself that I had to be confident and assertive so that they will feel safe and secure. (I think I pulled it off well)

I paid for the admission, we got our wrist bands and we entered the chaos. When the boys feel uncomfortable, they cover their heads with their shirts- the little one will actually close his eyes. They did this when they first got to our house and have done it a few times since. I guided them through the (much larger than I realized) warehouse full of bouncy structures and told them that they could go play! “Go! Go! You’ll have fun!” There were kids everywhere!

When we got to the big slide they expressed some interest. I pointed to the other kids who were climbing the rope ladder to the top and told them to give it a try. They hesitantly took on the challenge, looking over their should to be sure I was still there the whole way up. After they got to the top and then back down, via the slid, they were sold. They did it again, and again. After the third time I pointed to the other things they could play on and encouraged them to GO, PLAY. I went and sat at the table where I told them I’d be and they were off. I was a proud mama.

***

Before we left that day, I had put chicken and rice in the crock-pot so dinner would be done when we got home. I had never put rice in the crock-pot before, but I thought, surely, it would by just fine. WRONG! When I scooped it out of the pot and onto the plate I started laughing. It was a MESS! A disgusting, gluey mess! GROSS!

We all took a bite, Brett said it didn’t taste like anything, and it really didn’t, even though I had seasoned it with SnP, poultry seasoning, garlic and onion powder…The boys started eating it. I asked them if they liked it, they didn’t say much. The decision was quickly made to go to McDonald’s. The boys were VERY excited about their chicken nuggets and the toy in their happy meal.

After we got home and ate dinner the boys took their baths and put on their jammies. Then we hunkered down on the couch with pillows and blankets (much like we had tried the night before with Shrek II) and Brett read the first chapter of The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe. The little one fell asleep on my lap (BEST FEELING IN THE WORLD) and the older one asked questions about the story. We were happy, happy parents.